“Big Sis, I don't have a group of friends. I know that sounds so childish, but it’s something I feel really sad about. I see all these huns being super close and bonding and ish, but I ain't got that kinda vibe in my own life.
I see you, Chomi. It can be tough to always feel like you are on the outside looking in. Especially when girl power is one of the strongest #goodvibes out there. Shiiiiiiii, seeing groups of women lifting each other up, sharing laughs, and having each other’s backs is powerful.
Of course, you wish you had that too.
But let me tell you something loud and clear: building your own sisterhood is not only possible— but it’s yours to create, on your own terms.
Sisterhood is about more than just friends. It’s a bond, a vibe, a chosen family that gets you, lifts you up, and shows up for you in the messy, real-life stuff. Just like I show up for the sistas in Mzansi!
Think about what you want in a sisterhood - it can look different for every sister circle and that's okay. Some sisters love a deep connection, others may feel it's cringe to get too touchy-feely. The boundaries are for the dolls to iron out. Knowing what you need will help you spot the right vibes when they come your way.
You don’t need a full squad right away (or ever, tbh). One or two really good besties or homies are more than gold. And you don't need to go out into the wild and just cold connect. Take it easy - maybe join clubs, groups or spaces that align with your interests and goals and take it from there. There are loads of hobby groups or even online communities you can try. Check out sites like Friend Match or Meet Up. The key is to find places where people are already into what you’re into.
Whether it’s meeting at your local community centre, a park, or a group chat on WhatsApp, make sure the vibe feels safe and supportive. This is where trust begins. Set the tone early: honesty, kindness, and no judgment allowed. Always prioritise your safety—use well-known platforms, meet in public places, and trust your instincts when connecting with new people.
Sisterhood isn’t about rushing into things. Don't try to fake that deep bond you see out there. You gotta put the work in to get to that level, babes. Let’s try to remember that everyone has been hurt before, and just because you are ready to get real deep and down into the sisterhood steez, that doesn't mean another sis doesn't need some warming up, first. Share a little bit of yourself at a time, and as trust grows, so will your bond. Remember, sis, it’s okay to be cautious with your heart—it’s precious!
No one’s perfect—not you, or your future sisters. Be ready for the occasional disagreement or misstep. What matters is showing up for each other through the ups and the downs.
Sisterhood isn’t just about having people to hang out with. It’s about feeling seen, supported, and empowered. It’s about knowing someone has your back when life gets heavy and being that person for someone else.
If you’re sitting there thinking, “That sounds great, Big Sis, but what if I don’t have the confidence to put myself out there?” I get it—it’s scary.
But here’s the truth: the women you’re looking for? They’re probably looking for you too. So take the first step, even if it’s small.
A simple “Hi” - just like when you approached me for the first time, neh? And look how great that turned out?
Your sisterhood is out there waiting, sis.
Go find it—or better yet, create it.
Big Sis