How You Speak To Yourself Is How The World Experiences You

Chomi,

Your mind and heart are like sponges — they soak up everything around you, especially while you’re young. The things people say and how they treat you shape how you see yourself and what you believe about who you are. What nobody told you when you were young is that they were:

• Trauma dumping - when someone shares a lot of their deep or painful experiences all at once — without checking if the other person is ready or okay to listen.
• Parentifying – when a child has to act like the parent, taking on adult roles like managing family emotions or being their parent’s “therapist.”
• Or straight up bullying you.

With the heart of a child, you believed every word. Yazi, ukhule thinking what people projected onto you is your truth. Manje the voice in your head keeps saying the same things to you to this day! Over and over and over again! It’s like being on a merry-go-round, wanting to get off but it won’t stop spinning. U thuke, u khale but stopping dololo.

Thankfully, there are ways to stop the merry-go-round. You’re here reading this blog, that’s one way! Chomi, another simple life hack is to try mindfulness — just being present and paying attention to what’s happening right now. Listen to the voice in your head and then write down what it is saying. Write down the things that voice said. Some might bring you down, but focus on the ones that make you feel most loved, supported, seen, valued, and empowered.

Make a new list. Write down what you would like the voice in your head to say instead. If the voice in your head said the following things in the old list: “You can’t do that, you’re going to fail.” Your new list can say “Trying new things is hard at first. I can do anything I take the time to learn.” Now the voice is kinder.

Every time you hear the old, negative voice, look at your new list and say the kinder thing to yourself. Cos wena you have always been enough and amazing.

So what will you put in your new list? Talk to me, I’d love to know.

📞Call the Big Sis Helpline: 08000 12 84 55

💬Chat with the Big Sis AI Chatbot on WhatsApp/Moya: 060 074 7837

☎️Or call SADAG (toll-free): 0800 567 567

#NameItToTameIt, #BreakTheSilence, #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth, #MentalHealthIsReal, #JiKi'Zinto, #BigSis, #IronSharpensIron